Lately I’ve been in one of those phases where no video game is enough, where I’ve hunted a game – a something – through download libraries and subscription catalogs and a few closet drawers to no avail, a search across the chest and shoulder blades of the game any wandering, indescribable itching that I cannot scratch. However, I suspect I’m not alone in this, so if you ever find yourself in the same place, may I suggest: the wipe up.
Mopping up takes many forms. For me, somewhat uncreatively, the task is to complete a “living Dex” in Pokemon – catching one of every Pokemon ever released and storing them all in one place in order, including all of the many different forms and stages of each Development . This makes it a bit more cumbersome than completing a regular regional or national Pokédex because you can’t just catch an Abra and then evolve it into Kadabra and then Alakazam and swipe all three at once – you need to have one of each in your possession at the same time.
However, the challenge is really secondary. A good mop-up I think will always have a few common elements. One is that it happens, by definition, at the end of a game that you’ve broadly completed – think about completing side quests, beating the last surviving enemies on a certain list, swiping the last factions off a map, and so on.
This is very similar to trophy and/or achievement hunting, but there’s one key difference that’s also another ubiquitous ingredient of a good mop-up: it has to be genuinely satisfying. As in, the things you need to do during the process Feel good to doregardless of any additional, external (I refuse to say “extrinsic”) rewards or incentives for doing so, like that telltale little ding-a-ling of platinum popping when you’re done.
Finally, an essential ingredient: a small amount of bullshit. It’s hard to quantify – everyone has different tolerance levels for this stuff – but this is where Pokémon’s seemingly endless endgame becomes such a great example. Catching Pokemon is easy on paper, but in practice it’s as difficult as you’d like it to be.
For example, catching wild Pokémon the old-fashioned way — draining health, blasting them with some form of Sleep and/or Stun, hurling Poké Balls — is the easiest of many methods you’ll need to master in order to complete a living Pokédex. You can do it with any old Pokemon on your team, but you’ll soon find that it starts to get slow and awkward. Your team may be too high to destroy a wild monster’s health without completely eliminating it. So you should teach him a false hit, a move that does at most enough damage to leave an opponent with 1 HP remaining.
But not all Pokémon can learn False Swipe! So you may need to catch one – and you may need to find the item that lets you teach False Swipe in the first place. And what about those sleep-inducing or paralysis-inducing movements? It also needs to know them if you want to get through this quickly. One of each, because some Pokémon can’t sleep and others can’t be paralyzed – and some, namely Ghost-types, aren’t damaged by False Swipe either. At this point, you might as well get yourself a “catcher Pokemon” – one that can learn four fully useful moves to cover (almost) any eventuality – which will take time to sort itself out. Then you want to level it up then You can begin. And remember, this is one of several methods you’ll use along the way.
It’s that faff, loosening up, jogging in place, start-grid-wheels-spin-work-before-work that’s part of the joy of a good mop. That means that once the mopping begins, an extra layer of satisfaction coats the surface, an almighty crunch that sounds every time you use your excessive, over-prepared power to smack a big, fat tick into the next little box beat on the list. Goal: destroyed.
Again, this is what makes a good mop a good mop. What I crave as I cling to this impossible game is, I’ve realized, a kind of paradox. I crave something that feels immensely satisfying, that gives a sense of real accomplishment; but also something that gives me that satisfaction over and over again – and also, Alsoat least reasonably healthy.
What I’m aiming for is a rejection of what I’m often left with in other games, the extremes of instantly satisfying but obviously addictive stimulation – the double kills of League of Legends, the ft-ft-fit from headshots in CoD, goals from FIFA, one more turn at a 4X, one more level at an RPG, one more daily objective at every service game under the sun – or at the other end the tighter challenge of “higher” games that want, that you earn it, through mastery of systems, or through challenges, or through sheer amounts of text.
I love these games, but I don’t love their baggage, the things they want or need from me. Unlike these, a mop-up is something you do for love – because you just feel like having one of each Pokemon. Because they are neat. In fact, a mop-up is really a regaining of control. A reorganization of power. A rare instance where you don’t use your gaming time as a gift to anyone but yourself.