It’s dumb, too long, and lacks the high-stakes excitement that made the original so worth watching.
I’ll phrase the answer in the form of a question: Why don’t I like Celebrity Jeopardy!?
Don’t get me wrong: I’m not a jeopardy! “Fundamentalist. I’ve rolled with the changes over the years: the removal of the five-day limit on gigs, the weird “rotating hosts” thing that followed the death of Alex Trebek.
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But this prime-time spin-off where celebrities click buzzers where ordinary people traditionally go head-to-head doesn’t work for me.
“Celebrity Danger!” debuted on ABC-TV last week (September 25) and will continue for many more as famous personalities compete to win money for their favorite charities.
It’s not a new concept: There was celebrity “Jeopardy!” Tournaments in the past where stars have played for charity, albeit not in prime time. The charity part is fine; It’s the glory element I can’t stand.
One of the charms of plain old “Jeopardy!” That it puts non-performers in a high-pressure situation where everything depends on how much they know. They may not look like homecoming kings. They might have some idiosyncrasies. But none of that matters when upon the arrival of Final Jeopardy, they know the name of the fictional character who becomes king after his cousin Heardred dies in battle. (Beowulf, the correct answer in a last last round).
I’m pretty sure Celebrity Jeopardy! will never challenge his competitors with Beowulf.
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To accommodate the telegenic people playing the celebrity version, the producers made the game simpler. How simple? Now, how many people would be at a loss if asked to identify the Christmas carol that includes “five golden rings”? I mean it’s only repeated 8 times in the 12 Days of Christmas.
The cast of last week’s debut – actors Simu Liu, Andy Richter and Ego Nwodim – are appealing TV types but obviously don’t have the Jeopardy! Chops of the quirky Matt Amodio, or the relentless Amy Schneider, or a host of other champions who came out of nowhere – like all of them – to impress us with their intelligence.
Second, the show feels stretched because it includes a “triple jeopardy” round that only seems to be added to give contestants time to banter. I don’t want any banter. I want a tight, tense half-hour of science, literature, and word origins.
Third, even when celebrity candidates lose, they win by advancing their careers thanks to prime-time exposure. You’re not Ryan Long, a new Jeopardy! champion who forgot to bring his goggles to the show taping. He squinted at $299,000 — life-changing money for the unpretentious rideshare driver who has an impressive arsenal of facts at his disposal.
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But lest I give the impression that I have nothing good to say about Celebrity Jeopardy! I offer:
For all its flaws, it has to be better than the prime-time game show that followed it: Celebrity Wheel of Fortune.
Joe Blundo is a Dispatch columnist
@joeblundo